DAY TRIPPER

Today I paid a visit to 40 ACRE ROCK which is about 45 minutes away in the far southwestern part of Lancaster County. I have given up trying to upload images to blogger, so I created a flickr account, and I think I've figured out how to use it. See, if you click here, you will be taken to a set of 15 photos that I took this morning. I actually took over 30 pictures but I pared it down. It's a rather bleak and desolate place at this time of the year, but come springtime, there are lots of little pools that form on the surface of the granite face, which play host to a wide variety of rare mosses, ferns, and other rare plants which have adapted to such a hostile environment. Apparently there are some endangered species that ONLY grow in this sort of place. Walking around 40 Acre Rock is almost like walking on the surface of another planet. It's a unique spot, that's for sure. I was probably the only person there---saw no cars nor signs of life, other than plants and birds and rocks and things. A pity about the graffiti, though---I got a photo of the inside of a cave, and the flash of my digital camera revealed just how nasty it is in there.

BREAKING NEWS! No More Cryptic Remarks

After literally hours and hours spent on the phone every single day for the last few months, after a number of care packages sent, after tears and laughter and moments of hope and moments of feared futility, I am so proud and happy to report that two new members will be joining the other five feisty felines. May I please introduce you to Ellie and Baby! Ellie is an orange tabby with a croaky meow. Baby has a coat of gray and white, and is a purrer if ever there was one. I know because I've heard Mr. Baby purr very often while on the telephone.


ELLIE CAT


BABY CAT

And who do these furry felines belong to, you might ask? The lovely lady who has decided to come live with me. Once upon a long ago, we were a couple. Then again not so long ago, but what seems like an eternity at times. And now, with a bond stronger than ever before and nowhere to go but to the toppermost of the poppermost, may I please re-introduce Miss Stephanie S. Teskey, in a photo taken just a couple of weeks ago!!!


STEPHANIE HUMAN

I've been doing the happy dance so much that my right knee, still occasionally feeling the effects of my crouton-related injury, has been acting up again. But it's a joyful pain, and a joyful noise we shall make together when at last Stephanie is here. Have you ever needed or wanted someone or something so powerfully that you've dedicated your energy, strength, and total focus towards making it happen, making it work, and making the most of it, knowing that the benefits you'll reap will be worth the effort and time spent...for a long time to come, possibly for the rest of your life? Well, this is a shining example. 'Good things come to those who wait' is a cliche, yes...but one that has never rang truer to these ears. Patience is a beautiful thing. Love is even better.

I love you, Stephanie! And I'm proud to let the whole world know, and shout it to random people on the side of the road, and scream it at the stars, sing it to the cats and Kodi, and do happy dances all by myself in the meantime. I'll be here with open arms, candles, love handles, and delicious meals made just for you on October 6th when you arrive!

ANOTHER GREEN THING

Saw this baby green anole in one of the bushes in front of my house yesterday afternoon. Likely came out of his shell within the past week. I had the camera on 10X zoom. He kindly got into a staredown with me as I took a few pictures before scuttling away. Was it I who scuttled or reptile? Discuss amongst yourselves.

KISS THAT FROG!

Found this lil' bright green amphibian on the pillar outside my front door this morning when I went to walk Kodi. The biggest tree frog I've ever seen. It rained here for at least 15 hours straight yesterday, so I guess he went out on business and found himself there.

Being Sick Sucks...

Stephanie told me I jinxed myself. I suppose that once again, she is correct. She's got a knack for that. I have a head cold. Thankfully I'm not nauseous or plagued with irritable bowels, but I'm sneezing up a storm, coughing up some wonderful colors of phlegm, and my muscles are achy. I'd told her a few days ago that I couldn't remember the last time I'd come down with something. Lo and behold, within 72 hours, I was under the weather.

I'm loving the new job at the library. A lot of things are coming back to me from when I worked at Morrison. A lot has changed in the interim, but I feel good about what I'm doing. I enjoy what I do there. Compared to the restaurant business, it's an incredibly refreshing change. Now I'm just asking myself, "why did I wait so long", but hey---better late than never, eh? Eh.

There is a 'staff day' coming up on October 9th, and yesterday I was informed that they will be paying tribute to my mother, so I am bringing a photograph of her to work today to be displayed on the occasion. Several of my new co-workers introduced themselves to me over the past couple of days, people who knew her and spoke lovingly of her. Touched, I was, in many ways. It may sound strange to say it, but working at the library is another way that allows me to heal, I think. To move past the grieving and get to a stage where I remember the good times, rather than being haunted by the last few months of her life and the agony she went through. It's a good thing.

I've finally finished cleaning out the other bedroom. It's still furnished, but it's available for occupancy. I've got someone in mind and I'm hoping she makes up her mind someday soon. I think she will. There are a few things left in the closet I have to find a place for, but other than that, it's an empty room screaming for a warm body with a good heart to sleep in it each and every night. I've got three days of vacation coming up at Trio, and I should use them before I decide to quit---I'm hoping I can get on full-time with the library before too long, and I think I might use the vacation days at the end of September or the beginning of October. As far as I can tell, this month ends on a weekend, and I'll be off from the library that weekend. I'd have Sat 9/30, Sun 10/1, and Mon 10/2 off. It'd be a great time to take a lil' road trip, maybe in a U-Haul. Hint, Hint. 4 5683 968 SST.

Happy Birthday, Mom

Today would have been my mother Mary's 60th birthday. I knew this would be a difficult day when it arrived, and sure enough, it is. I didn't need to go buy a bottle of Jovan White Musk this year, or send an e-card or go buy a birthday card. When I was cleaning out her bathroom closet I realized she had plenty of Jovan White Musk anyway. But it's been sent to Goodwill---the bottles that hadn't been opened at least.

Today is my second day working at South County Regional library, hereafter referred to as SOR. And I have a cold. I started feeling less than fine yesterday in the late afternoon before I left work, and a scratchy throat is now rather sore. Yesterday's dry hack is now bringing up sinus drainage. My sad head is also a bit stuffy. So I'm going to go into work at SOR today feeling rather cruddy, but I'll live. It's only a 4 hour shift. I just hope I can get rid of this bug before Wednesday, when I'm working both jobs.



Do I look like a librarian?

I don't know if anyone I met at SOR yesterday knew my Mom, or if they did, made the connection. There's a lady there named Paula who came to sit with Mom one weekend day while she was back at home after the cancer spread to her brain. Paula is a cancer survivor. I hope she's working today so I can go say hello to her.

Two bill collectors have already called this morning. Stupid fucking SunCom called. I already paid those cocksmoking buttplugs. And gave them a copy of the death certificate. "We're SunCom, and we suck dick"...that's how that Harry Connick Jr. jingle should go. So glad to be gone from SunCom.

Now it's time to walk Kodi. Kodi has adjusted very well to Mom's absence. It took a awhile, but she's doing okay. Usually I think I've adjusted and adapted pretty darn well, but this looks like it might be one of those days where I occasionally just collapse in a heap of sadness. I'm glad I'm working today, even if I feel sick. I just hope I don't have any 'emotional moments' while I'm at work.

I did an "In Memoriam" for today's Charlotte Observer. It wasn't cheap! But I wanted to do it, for a variety of reasons...below I've included the original photo, taken in the back room at Carmel Branch with my Mom and good friend Julie Cooper...then the way I cropped it because I wanted the "novello" to show up in the newspaper photo, and finally the way it actually appeared in today's paper.

CHANGE IS NOW

Holy Cow! Good news to report. Starting Monday, I'll be a proud employee of the Public Library of Charlotte/Mecklenburg County once again.

This is where you imagine me doing the happy dance.

I'll be working at South County Regional. It's only a part-time position, but it's a new beginning. It's a change. It's a good thing, and I am ready to make the most of it. Very ready.

I'm still working at Trio for the time being. I got a phone call just as I was pulling into work this afternoon, at which point the job was offered, and I gladly accepted. About 20 minutes later, I broke the news to my kitchen manager. I'm going to stick with Trio for at least a couple of weeks, but I really don't think I want to be there come October. That's "Lobsterfest". That's the time of year when all of the promo menu items have, you guessed it, LOBSTER. And one of the things we do is offer a whole Maine Lobster, boiled alive. They come in alive. We take skewers and shove them up the asses of those poor lobsters, to keep them from curling as they're boiled alive.

And to be honest with you, that's something I never want to have to do ever again.

The folks at Trio have been so supportive of me these past several months...actually, it's been almost a full year since Mom was originally diagnosed with breast cancer, and my life has taken many strange turns since then...I had to take a lot of time off from work to help her and to be there for her, had to go part-time for a while, and I certainly didn't want to just quit without giving them proper notice. I might complain about some things that go on at work, but who doesn't complain about their job now and then? But I'd reached a point where I knew I was capable of so much more, and the things I am passionate about don't really have an outlet there. I'm going to feel like a productive member of society again.

Sometimes you pray for an opportunity. A chance. You want something so bad you cry, you reach in vain, you worry yourself sick hoping. I have other things to hope for. There is a woman I love who I hope one day I will be able to love again, fully and completely. There are places I want to go some day before I die. There are things I want to do that I can't even describe. But starting Monday, another new chapter will begin in this life for me, and I've needed this to happen. Not just wanted, but needed. I know Mom is smiling right now...she wanted so many good things for me, but it wasn't until I realized I wanted them myself that I've acted in a way that would allow good things to happen. Even if she's not here, I know she sees it, and I know she's proud.

A Purely Random Update

It's come to my attention that I haven't written in here for a couple of weeks. Two, to be exact. So in the interests of re-assuring people who check this that I haven't fallen into a deep depression or gone off the deep end, here's a summary of what's been happening over the last couple of weeks...

I took a picture of Bitty. I take lots of pictures of Bitty. This is where she likes to sleep during the day.



I've been doing a lot of catering deliveries in the morning. Last week I was in Rock Hill almost every day. This week I've been to Matthews, Rock Hill, and around Charlotte. Lots of extra money, which is always good. I'm finally back full-time at Trio starting next week, but I'm hoping that won't be for long.

I finally have a job interview with PLCMC on Monday, for a position at South County. I am pumped about this. Monday morning at 9am...then I have an appointment with the lawyer at 10:30.

I went to the dirt track last Saturday with Ed. It was dirty, stinky, but still fun...my favorite fan was there once again---the woman who used to flip off all the drivers as they went around Turn 4 except for her favorite driver. I don't know why, but she doesn't flip people off anymore. Maybe because her kids are old enough that she doesn't get shitfaced in front of them anymore? I dunno. Timbo Mangum owns that track. He ran in the SuperStock and Late Model divisions, and won both of them handily. Lap after lap, a perfect circle. The BBQ sandwiches seem to have taken a step down, unfortunately, or maybe it was the fact I didn't eat one until almost 11pm. I didn't get a funnel cake. I took a few pictures, but none really came out very well. Here's one that did.


I'm still waiting on the lawyer to get the the form via Probate Court so that I can open an estate account to settle Mom's outstanding debts, transfer the car titles, cancel one insurance policy, and alter the other. Or shop around for a better deal from someone else. Lots of stuff still to be done. Part of the reason I have to go there on Monday morning is to present them a copy of the "divorce decree" so that the probate court judge can see that yes, Mom and Dad really are divorced. Can't they just call someone somewhere to verify? One delay after another. And in the meantime, bill collectors are starting to call, with Discover Card leading the way. Stephanie had mentioned how frequently they are apt to call should you fall even slightly behind on payments, and I'm DISCOVERing it myself now. At least they don't mask their phone number on the caller ID.

Why can't dogs puke on the tile floor instead of the carpet? Kodi just barfed. I guided her to the kitchen floor and she spewed a bit of yellow bile, then turned around and saved most of it for the carpet. I'm glad I got more odor/stain remover at Target last week. At least I know it wasn't cat food that upset her stomach. Sebastian the monster cat has figured out how to open the cabinets in the kitchen and bathroom. The walker that Hopsice provided that Mom never used has found a purpose.


Speaking of Target and last week, I bought an outdoor grill. A Weber Smokey Joe charcoal grill. Nothing fancy, but quite effective.


Grilled up some bratwursts with Ed before the race on Saturday, grilled sirloin steak (med. rare) on Monday and Tuesday...and will probably grill up some Italian sausages on Saturday. Bert likes to sit at the dinner table with me.


There's a place called The Peach Stand on the other side of Fort Mill that has a truly fantastic butcher shop, and I got some crab cakes to go with the steaks. I ate like a king this week. Granville was very thoughtful and picked up a pound of Eastern Style NC BBQ from Smithfield on his way back from taking his sister back to college in Fayetteville. Granville's sister is engaged now. She wasn't even born when me and Granville first became friends.

I trained a new kid at Trio yesterday. I asked him where he went to high school, and he goes to South Meck, as I once did. I mentioned to him that I'd graduated from there in 1991...and he told me he was born in 1990. Tomorrow will be my last Saturday off at Trio for quite a while. But hopefully I won't be working at Trio for much longer, if luck smiles my way and I do get the gig with the library.

Little Shadow is nearly as big as Momma Shadow now.


Last night Stephanie and I were talking on the phone before bedtime, and we got to discussing favorite this and thats...and she asked what my favorite food is. For the longest time it was peanut butter and jelly. I'm kinda worn out on peanut butter...for the time being, at least. Now it's french toast made with brioche bread.

Thanks to the thoughtfulness of Caroline, I have a few photos which portray brothers Bert and Ernie in their infancy, with their proud and protective momma. It's so easy to forget sometimes how helpless and tiny these big happy cats were once upon a long ago. They still curl up together on the bed like they are in the photos shown below.

Brotherly Love.

On Monday I took a catering delivery up to Salisbury...53 freakin' miles from Trio. I've made sojourns to Monroe, Gastonia, Rock Hill, and Lancaster, but none of them are anywhere near as fAR away. Got $50 bucks for the effort, I had the day off, and I'd been contemplating a road trip anyway, so why not?

In every town I visit to deliver food, I have a restaurant I like to visit after delivering the catering order. In Rock Hill, I often stop by Steak & Hoagie, or The Shrimp Boat. In Lancaster...well...Sonic or the Chinese buffet. In Gastonia, it's gotta be RO's BBQ. In Monroe, I go to Cook-Out. But Salisbury? Cripes, I've never eaten there. So I dug out a map, and plotted a course on the way home that would take me through Mount Pleasant, home of WHAT-A-BURGER. I've not eaten at What-A-Burger since my college days at UNCC. What-a-fucking-burger indeed. I was almost swayed, however---there was a Troutman BBQ directly across the street, but I went with my heart and my belly. I wasn't disappointed. And the drive home was great. It was a wonderful cruise along backroads, through corn fields, tobacco fields, old dark houses, and shiny new developments, through Rowan, Cabarrus, Stanley, and Union counties as I made my way back home to Lancaster County. I took my camera along, and I'm glad I did, if only for one reason:

TOM WAITS IN ASHEVILLE

Last night, I witnessed a rather amazing spectacle: Tom Waits, live in concert. Here's the set list:

Singapore
Make it Rain
Hoist That Rag
Shore Leave
November
Gods Away on Business
'Til the money Runs out
All The World Is Green
Tango 'Til They're Sore
Invitation to the Blues
You Can Never Hold Back Spring
Clap Hands
Whistling Past The Graveyard
Heartattack and Vine
Lie to Me Baby
What's He Building in There
Trampled Rose
Get Behind the Mule
Murder in the Red Barn
Goin' out West
Way Down In The Hole
Blue Valentine
Dont Go into that Barn

I knew a few of the songs, but not very many. Highlights were Make it Rain, God's Away on Business, Tango 'Til They're Sore, Invitation to the Blues, Clap Hands, Heartattack and Vine, What's He Building in There, Get Behind the Mule, and Goin' out West. It really was a great show---I've not often spent that kind of money on a musician whose work I wasn't intimately familiar with, but I really had a good time. Everyone did.

Lindsay rented a mini-van, and Peter (Lindsay's olde pal from Florida), Wendell, Ed, Beth (Ed's friend from the lyeberry) and I piled in around 2pm and headed up to the mountains for the afternoon and evening. We got to will-call shortly right at 4:30, and were out of the line with tickets in hand within 10 minutes. It was very well organized. Then we kinda fanned out, and browsed around town. I visited a couple of bookstores, a record shop, a couple of dirty hippie clothing shops, and a very cool jewelry store with lots of stones and agate formations and petrified wood paperweights, etc. Got a little gift there for a lady friend.

Around 6pm we met back at a restaurant called The Laughing Seed Cafe. It was a vegetarian restaurant. "International Vegetarian Cuisine"...Yes, folks, I not only went inside, but I also ate dinner there. This is what I had, straight from the menu: LOW COUNTRY ROLLUPS ($8.95) A sweet and tangy tofu barbecue wrapped in whole wheat tortillas with Monterey jack cheese, topped with tahini mustard sauce. Served with salad and brown rice. I had chipotle ranch dressing on the salad, and to wash it down, Berry Bliss Organic Herbal Iced Tea. Honey sweetened, with elderberry, rosehips, hibiscus, bilberry, nettle, oat straw, and lavender. A rich, addictive blend. Extremely beneficial to the immune system, full of vitamin C and bioflavonoids, also very calming, norishing, and soothing to the nervous system, good for the eyes. I don't know about all that, but it was damn good tea. The food was terrific, the service was a bit on the slow side, but they were doin' a lot of business, so no complaints. And all that healthy vegetarian stuff didn't mess with my system, so I'm no worse for the wear.

Several photos are forthcoming, but blogger is being finicky today, and I haven't been able to upload pictures from yesterday. Soon come.

Tropical Storm Chris runs out of steam

Just a couple of days after forming, the storm with which I share a name has petered out. What a great headline.

These walls have ARt.



Behind me on the once bare wall is a blanket that my great-grandma Kester made many moons ago. It also serves to improve the acoustics of the room. A multi-tasking wall hanging. Can't beat that.

This coming Wednesday, I will get the closest thing to a vacation that I've had in many months. A day trip to Asheville to see Tom Waits in concert with my good friends, Lindsay, Ed, and Wendell. I can't wait!!! I hope he sings the following song:

Pasties and a G-string

Smelling like a brewery,
looking like a tramp
I ain't got a quarter
got a postage stamp
Been five o'clock shadow boxing
all around the town
Talking with the old men
sleeping on the ground
Bazanti bootin
al zootin al hoot
and Al Cohn
sharin this apartment
with a telephone pole
and it's a fish-net stockings
spike-heel shoes
Strip tease, prick tease
car kease blues
and the porno floor show
live nude girls
dreamy and creamy
and the brunette curls
Chesty Morgan and a
Watermelon Rose
raise my rent and take off
all your clothes
with the trench coats
magazines bottle full of rum
she's so good, it make
a dead man cum, with
pasties and a g-string
beer and a shot
Portland through a shot glass
and a Buffalo squeeze
wrinkles and cherry
and twinky and pinky
and FeFe live from Gay Paree
fanfares rim shots
back stage who cares
all this hot burlesque for me

cleavage, cleavage thighs and hips
from the nape of her neck
to the lip stick lips
chopped and channeled
and lowered and louvered
and a cheater slicks
and baby moons
she's hot and ready
and creamy and sugared
and the band is awful
and so are the tunes

crawlin on her belly shakin like jelly
and I'm getting harder than
Chinese algebraziers and cheers
from the compendium here
hey sweet heart they're yellin for more
squashing out your cigarette butts
on the floor
and I like Shelly
you like Jane
what was the girl with the snake skins name
it's an early bird matinee
come back any day
getcha little sompin
that cha can't get at home
getcha little sompin
that cha can't get at home
pasties and a g-string
beer and a shot
Portland through a shot glass
and a Buffalo squeeze
popcorn, front row
higher than a kite
and I'll be back tomorrow night
and I'll be back tomorrow night

REPRINTED BY PERMISSION OF THE ORIGINAL AUTHOR

Ed wrote a poem about my mother's battle with cancer, and I wanted to publish it on my blog, with his blessings. She died a month ago today, and I felt this would be an appropriate time to post it here. Without further ado...Ed's words follow:

OK, a friend's mother (She is a friend too. I've known her longer than I've know him) is fighting cancer and is having a rough time recently. She has been on my mind so I've written this:

1.

She sounds no different on the telephone
a voice I've heard for twelve years.
"Chris is in the bathroom,
I'll have him call you back."

I visit, she's bald like my Grandpa Ed
when he was seventy, small stragglers
of hair poking out like cactus in a desert
She's watching soap operas.

Medicine arrives by Fed Ex
a chart of medications, morning and night
she must be feeling better
mother and son bicker like before.

2.

Alive and dead
Brave and terrified
I've heard you can't fight this stuff
you just wait it out.

We're all flowers
blooming and dying.
We're bees, stinging and dying
We're cigarettes glowing
burning down to ashes,
then ground into the remains
of other cigarettes.

3.

There are cracks in the ground
outside the condominium
someday these units too, will fall.

TROUBLESHOOTING

After Mom passed away, I started to move some of the stuff from my bedroom downstairs. Including the computer. For a time, I had the computer right next to the TV. That was the ideal place for it. But I've been having problems with the cable modem cutting off...several times a day. I changed wires, checked plugs, inspected cords for feline bite marks, all to no avail. I think that the signal strength gets low at times, and it causes the cable modem to lose the signal. Both the cable and the modem were hooked up from the same outlet, with a splitter. I decided to move the computer so that it would have its own dedicated output for the modem, which involved moving the cable wire from my TV upstairs down here, and stretching it from the kitchen outlet into the living room. Now that everything is re-re-arranged, I took a few photos of the living room and dining room as they appear today. I think this is permanent, so long as I'm living alone at least. It might seem selfish, but making the downstairs more "me-ish" has helped me to move on with things, as I continue to grieve over my Mother's death. Anyway, take a look and behold the new set-up.

I guess I'm a cat lover...

In addition to Bert, Ernie, Rascal, Sebastian, and Bitty Kitty, I've been feeding an outside cat named Shadow for quite a while. I wrote here a few weeks back about putting out some dry kitten food for Shadow (left-over from when Bitty was a kitten), and that the very next morning, Shadow had moved her two kittens to my front porch. I've only seen one of those two kittens for the past couple of weeks, but the little one is getting a bit bolder day-by-day. So I just took pictures of mommy Shadow and baby Shadow.

High School Memories

When I was in high school, I took a class called "earth science". The "teacher" shall remain nameless. My buddy had him the year before I did. We used to find creative ways to playfully harass this guy. The photoscan you see below was placed in his teacher's mailbox in the office one day at lunch my senior year of high school.

GOOD FOOD

Once upon a time
I would wake and bake
Now I make a breakfast bake.

Bert smells it. It smells very good.

HAVE YOU SEEN THIS MAN?

Young And Innocent Days

My grandma Dorothy, my grandpa Leroy, cousin Scott on grandpa's lap, and me on grandma's lap. I miss them all very, very much.

And the hits just keep on comin...

R.I.P. Scott Cutrera

My cousin died Saturday night. He'd been clean and sober for 2+ years, until Saturday night. One relapse was all it took. He'd dated a girl named cocaine for a long, long time, and had finally freed himself from its clutches, and fell in love with a woman. They recently broke up, and he took it hard. He had rotator cuff surgery on the morning of my mother's visitation, and was worried that the painkillers he was taking might lead him down the wrong path again, but continued to attend AA meetings religously. But I guess he forgot some of the things I remind myself of to help me through this tough time...all the little things in the world to be grateful for. Information is still patchy, but apparently he was breathing around 1am on Saturday night, and when the person he was visiting awoke on Sunday morning at 10am, he was gone. I don't think he meant to take his own life, but I have a feeling he ingested an amount comparable to what he used to ingest on a daily basis, not realizing that his body's tolerance for the vice had shrunk greatly in the interim, and it was more than his body could handle. I visited his sister (my cousin Jill) and her super boyfriend (also named Scott) last night, to try and offer kind words and strength through my presence. His parents, Jean and Sam, are devastated. Aunt Jean has done so much to help me, and one of the things I've used to comfort myself regarding my mother's death is that a parent should never have to bury their own child---and now here she is, having to do exactly that. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it. I wish he'd put his trust in family and good friends, rather than a rock and a pipe. Toxicology tests and an autopsy will answer a few questions, but many more will never be answered. I love ya, cousin Scott. I'll miss playing Scrabble with you, because you kicked my ass most of the time, but I always enjoyed the challenge.

LIFE GOES ON...

I just got a haircut.

Mary Lynn Boone McComb

born September 12, 1946
died June 25, 2006.

Rest in peace, Mom. I love you so much!!! I know you're catching up with your dad right now, you're not in pain, you're not suffering any longer, and I will continue to honor your legacy every day I live. Don't worry about me, please. You need not worry any more. I know you're whole again, and I WILL be okay. I woke up this morning, and for a fleeting moment I thought yesterday was a nightmare. Then I realized it wasn't, and I started to cry again. I could have stayed in bed all day, but I didn't. Three years ago, I might have crawled under a rock or smoked myself into a stupor, but I've learned how much pride I can take in tackling one task at a time, knowing you would have done the same for me. Today was the dawn of a new day, one without your physical presence, but I feel your eternal love, and I will treasure the time God gave us before your body gave up on you. I know you tried. I know you were tired. You can sleep soundly again, at last.

"Death doesn't care just who it destroys
Now the woman gets sick, thins down to the bone
She says Where I'm going next, I'm going alone
Deeper water, deeper water." --- Paul Kelly

I know the water is calm wherever you are now, Mom. There are no riptides in God's ocean. Go for a swim, and have fun. You deserve it. I will think about you and all the love you gave me every day for the rest of my days.

Cease And Desist

Last night I hatched upon the idea of posting a series of humorous and potentially unflattering photos of a few of my friends, including semi-fictitious captions to enhance the silly angle I was trying to take with this project.

This morning, I received an e-mail from one of the "victims", who was deeply offended. To be brief, I was unaware that this whitey is so uptighty about his underpants. Not everyone has a boxers' torso, I suppose.

I have chosen to remove the offensive content, even though it was certainly not pornographic and violated no one's civil rights. I DO NOT BELIEVE in censorship, and the person who raised a hand in protest isn't the sort of person I normally associate with the likes of Tipper Gore. The link to this blog has disappeared from the offended friend's blog, denying me a huge volume of potential readers, I'm certain.

If you happened to visit this blog between 9:30PM EDT Wednesday and 10:30AM EDT on Thursday, you were one of the few to view a series of photographs that will never again be available to the viewing public.***

I feel like I've been threatened by the RIAA for downloading songs illegally. It's like Weng Weng has kicked me square in the nuts for owning a bootleg copy of The Impossible Kid on DVD-R.

All interested parties should be aware that my actions were all in the sake of good fun, if not good taste, and I meant no offense to anyone. I apologize to anyone who I may have insulted by posting the since-removed documents, and my lawyers are working hard on a settlement. They have suggested I include a rare photo of a Yeti, just prior to his fleeing into the hills of Western North Carolina.




***e-mail me directly to purchase glossy prints